Life with ADHD:

Online therapy  Asheville, NC


You knew from the very first weeks of kindergarten or even earlier that you just weren’t getting what the teacher was saying like the other kids, as evidenced by their quick answers before you  even digested the question, and the whole class’s movement to another question, leaving you in the dust. 


On the outside, no one had a clue that this was happening because you were very good at hiding what you were feeling with a silent, cheerful smile.  But in reality, each of these episodes of feeling separate or less than others felt like a ten ton weight of guilt stacked on your shoulders.  On the inside, the shame was eating away at your stomach acid so much, it was a wonder you didn’t have an ulcer .


Meanwhile, any wits you had about you to even remotely understand what was being taught had been thrown out the window by the perpetual cycle of shaming voices in your head. By the end of the day, you felt so bogged down that you hardly had the energy or motivation to even start your homework, much less finish it.   


At this point, you made a permanent habit of one of two things:  


> You dedicated the whole of every school night afternoon and evening doing informational acrobatics trying to transform the information you were given into something that made sense to your unique brain, not to mention translating it back into its original form to regurgitate to the teacher.


OR

>  You decided to plunge into utter despair and self-loathing because of the immense time and energy it took for you to get what was being taught.


So, the cycle continued right up through the years on top of the constant risk of tongue lashings from teachers and parents for making “careless mistakes”......

AKA, a hunk of bull, because you knew you were probably working and cared three times as much as anyone else in the class.   You know, the ones who seemed to coast by with no mistakes and plenty of time for extra curricular activities,  outside play with neighbors, or television after school.



As a result, you are now a grown professional woman who is exhausted, unmotivated, socially deprived, and constantly down on herself. 


You live in constant fear of making the next mistake and spend most evenings either catching up on projects or wallowing in a pool of worry, self-doubt, or rage over a piece of constructive feedback from a coworker or boss. 

You feel hopelessly caught between restlessness to be known and fear of rejection.

You’re like a fountain with the potential to flow strong and steady at all hours of the day.

But the way you are approaching life is drawing from an insufficient hose, so the overflow is slow and weak at best.  

 

What if you were able to face your past discouragements, deprivations, and episodes of being misunderstood and see them in a whole different light full of insight and curiosity? 

 

What if this cleared the way for you to identify the sources of energy and engagement that not only cure your boredom and drudgery…..

but engage you in a way that lights your soul on fire, leaving you refreshed and ready for the next task?

 

But first…..

What do we mean by ADHD?

Good Question: Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder

Traditionally…  it’s known as the reason some people can’t focus or that males can’t sit still

 
 

Now, research says it actually looks like this : 

  •   A total different type of nervous system based on interest rather than on duty or cause and effect, which makes it possible to Identify and access your unique way of  “getting in the zone” more often.

  •    Your sleep is interrupted by constant thinking.  

  • You become extremely guilty and anxious over the possibility of having offended someone and fear rejection,  which is called Rejection Sensitive Dyspohria, which actually gets in your way as much as or even more  than losing focus.  


ADHD Superpowers:

  • Creativity

  • Long Term Solutions from seeing big picture

  • Brain art- Make connections between two concepts no matter how unrelated they are

  • Adventurous

  • More than one idea in your mind at once

  • Endured and overcome hardships- compassionate, root for underdog, accept differences in self and others

  • Strong sense of humor for regulating emotion

  • Determination

  • Keen memory because they pay attention to details, see beauty in things most people rush past

  • Super focused when the subject is novel or engaging

  • Energy

  • Optimistic

  • Strong sense of right from wrong

 

What if you were able to use these superpowers to soar through your day with consistent abundance, not even tired by sundown? 

What if you were able to come at conflicts and missteps with a sense of self-compassion and insight that lit the path to even more sufficiency?  

 

I’ve personally witnessed many of my clients transform from scattered, self-doubting people pleasers to engaging, efficient, self-assured, boundary setters.




Complete healing can take as little as a few months in therapy, thanks to the evidence based method for processing trauma, called EMDR.  This process is tailored to each person’s unique emotional and intellectual strengths and includes use of all the senses so there is never a dull moment. Click the link below to learn more.

If you are ready for a more fully engaged, focused, and empowered life, make an appointment today.   You don’t have to keep suffering, I can help.